Corporal Acts of Mercy for New Parents
- Melanie
- Dec 11, 2018
- 5 min read
Why is it that St. Zélie Martin and her family stand out as such a wonderful example of holiness for modern families? I believe it is their consistent living out of the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy*. Zélie's letters are filled with countless examples of carrying out the works of mercy in big and small ways throughout her life, and you can count on an article in the future featuring some of her very inspiring works of mercy.
In this season of life it is usually impossible to do the big heroic acts of mercy that we typically associate with holiness- who has time to serve the poor on a Mother Teresa scale when you are changing diapers all day? As I am currently dealing with the first real illness of my baby girl, it got me thinking more about what living out the works of mercy looks like for new parents. The night before last she woke up every 45 minutes needing to be rocked and soothed, she was needy and refused naps all of yesterday, and she has been feverish and sneezing all day. I may not be ministering to the multitudes but I have plenty of opportunity to minister to the sick in my own home.
Thankfully, Mother Teresa herself said that "if you want to change the world, go home and love your family." So caring for your family is working for mercy on according to Mother Teresa herself! A new baby is a great opportunity for acts of service and works of mercy for the new baby and new parents. Here are some ideas for carrying out the corporal works of mercy in this transition to parenthood, as well as some ideas of how to bring mercy to other families when they welcome a new addition.
If you are the new parents: Many of these are unavoidable tasks for new parents, but perhaps thinking of them as works of mercy will change your outlook on the mundane and help you to do them with joy.
Feed the hungry
What could be more important than feeding your needy baby? Feeding your baby either breastmilk or formula is a full time job in the beginning, and adding solids at the appropriate age can be a challenge as well. As they grow you will help them to have a healthy relationship to food as both sustaining and enjoyable. Husbands, making sure your wife gets enough to eat is a great help- especially moms who are pregnant, just gave birth or are breastfeeding!
Give drink to the thirsty
Again- feed your baby! As they get older you will also be teaching them how to drink from a cup which may take a lot of your patience. Breastfeeding moms with adequate supplies may consider being milk donors. Babies like mine certainly appreciate it! Dads, make sure pregnant, postpartum, breastfeeding or baby-chasing mom is getting plenty of water.
Clothe the naked
This is a never ending task for parents of little ones. Diaper changes, clothing changes and mountains of laundry take up a good portion of each day for new parents.
Shelter the homeless
Create a warm and loving home for your baby. Set up a space for comfortable feeding and cuddling. Make sure your baby has a safe place to sleep that suites your family's preferences. Cleaning up the kitchen, doing a load of laundry or washing bottles can be a work of mercy for your spouse- just keeping the house within operating limits is a chore and serious work of mercy.
Visit the sick
Take care of your baby when they are sick or teething, which often means dealing with grumpy days and sleepless nights. It can also require some less than enjoyable tasks, such as helping them breathe more clearly with the Nose Frida- it’s gross but definitely more merciful than allowing them to drown in their own mucus. Taking care of your spouse who is recovering from delivery or c-section fits the bill as well.
Visit the prisoners
Arrange for your spouse to get visitors, especially if they stay at home or are on parental leave, so that they do not feel isolated and are able to have adult conversations about non-baby related topics.
Bury the dead
Be thankful for your little one! Share the baby love with those who have lost children or have been unable to have any. Make sure to have your own will in place and choose the best home for your child if the worst should happen.
Give alms to the poor
If you aren’t tithing and giving yet, now is the time to start. Children learn by example and need to see you putting the poor and the faith first in your finances. When they are old enough to have money and income of their own, start teaching them to set aside money to give and help them to give in a way that allows them to see the benefit to others. These experiences will be so memorable for them and shape their relationship to money. Follow the Dave Ramsey give, save, spend approach to children’s money.
If you would like to help new parents: We were blessed with so many of these works of mercy from friends and family when Josephine was born!
Feed the hungry
Bring food to new parents! It is hard to prepare meals in the early weeks and months of being home with a newborn. Arrange to bring them fresh meals or a stockpile of frozen dinners- bring food and don’t expect to stay and see the baby. The new parents may need time to themselves to recover, figure out feeding and adjust to their new roles which can be difficult to do if each food delivery includes an hour-long visit.
Give drink to the thirsty
Supply new parents with all the liquids required for their new state- that is, water, coffee and wine! But in all seriousness, a gift of a water bottle that does not require both hands to open, a fresh cup of coffee or a bottle of wine are great ways to help new parents feel supported.
Clothe the naked
Gift new parents the clothing, especially in larger sizes as baby grows. If you are crafty you could knit, crochet or sew clothing or blankets for the new baby.
Shelter the homeless
During visits, don’t just hold the baby- put yourself to work! If the new parents are comfortable with it, clean the kitchen, fold laundry, wash bottles or sweep the floor. Help to make their home a relaxing place to bond with their baby rather than a stressful array of dirty dishes and abandoned chores.
Visit the sick
Visit or send a thoughtful card to those who are sick in pregnancy, postpartum recovery or who have sick babies. Many new parents end up spending time in the NICU which can be extremely stressful, and some may have ongoing health problems or hospitalizations for either mom or baby.
Visit the prisoners
Visit those who are housebound because of bed rest, postpartum recovery, postpartum depression or anxiety, or a baby who refuses to nap outside of the house. These can be such isolating times! It is often easier for them to have visitors come over than it is to pack up and get out of the house
Bury the dead
Mourn babies lost to miscarriage or are stillborn. Talk about those babies who have been lost and acknowledge the parenthood of those who have lost them.
Give alms to the poor
Gift diapers and other items needed to provide for a new baby. This is a financially stressful time for many people and these gifts can be a huge relief of the financial burden.
Please feel free to comment with other ideas I have undoubtedly missed!
*I am unsure why there are two different lists of the Seven Corporal Works of Mercy, one including clothing the naked and another including giving alms to the poor. I have just included both for a total of eight.
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